Way back in 1985 a wise man named Dave Gahan dropped some serious knowledge on us when he said “people are people.” Darn right, Dave! And that’s exactly why most people are so stinking weird.
As most of my loyal readers know, I’ve been in a bit of a mood lately. Maybe it’s the constant barrage of hard core I’ve been listening to or maybe it’s just that as I get older I start to realize more and more how stupid adults can be. Remember when you were kid? You thought adults knew everything and were always right. At 32 years old there are still days when I want to be 17. I’m sure at 82 years old there will still be days when I want to be 17. Here are a few things that have caught my attention over the last few days and caused to think “wow, that’s pathetic/stupid.”
1. I needed to put gas in my Explorer over the weekend. When I pulled up to the pumps at Kroger the place was buzzing with activity. There were cars going in all directions and lines were forming behind each pump. I watched cars cutting each other off in this frenzy to get gas on a Sunday night. Drivers were glaring at each other with anger they would never dare act upon in their eyes. Something in me thought the scene was disgusting. Soccer moms and what-passes-as-men-these-days were sending king of the jungle body language to each other. All this malice just to be first to pay $2.50 a gallon. I don’t even know who to be mad at, but I was mad nonetheless.
2. Yesterday at the YMCA I’m getting dressed after my workout. I walk into the dressing room and there is a grown man standing there butt naked. Nothing unusual in a locker room, right? Right…except this guy was naked with the exception of his white socks. He was standing in his socks on top of his Reeboks. He carefully removed one sock at a time, being careful only to put his feet back down on top of his shoes – never touching the carpeted floor. I guess the tops of his shoes are completely and totally sanitary. Only once he had his regular socks back on did he sit down and proceed to get dressed. I wondered how a “man” becomes such a wimp that the thought of touching the floor with his feet causes him such fear. Wuss! Be a man. Deal with the athlete’s foot when and if you get it.
3. Driving home last night I was sitting at an intersection near my neighborhood. There’s lots of traffic at this particular intersection so I sat for several minutes. A blur passed by me. As I made it out I realized that it was some sort of motorcycle (not a cool Harley or something tough, but one of those crotch rockets). It was flying. Perched on the back holding on for dear life was a little girl, probably no older than 6 or 7 years old. Her father, the driver presumably, should be beaten.